CHECK YOUR EMOTIONS AT THE DOOR - PLEASE

One thing that always rings true is that "You can't take it with you."

Try telling that to someone who's going to sell a house they lived in for twenty years and haven't upgraded anything. Still, family memories and precious moments that occurred in the home make it priceless to the seller. It's not that they think they're taking the building with them when they die, but they feel that they will never have any good memories if they move away. As Realtors, we have the difficult task of explaining and convincing sellers, that the memories are theirs and their family's to keep no matter where they go and that they should look forward to making new memories.

The bad part about all this is that the buyer doesn't really care and that can become a real problem during negotiations. Reality can be tough for the seller and if not presented in a tactful and sympathetic manner, you can rest assured that the first offer presented will be your last chance to even try to negotiate the deal.

Being on the agent on the seller side of this scenario is difficult, but from the buyer agent side these challenges are just as real and difficult when presenting an offer that may be below asking but in line with market values. The seller is in an emotional state, while the buyer just sees dollars and cents, is totally detached and borderline insulting (by the seller's expectation).

It's the duty of the seller's agent to obtain the highest price for the client and to make the process as seamless as possible; but in these cases, the agent is aware that the owner is not in line with the market. When this type of scenario presents itself, it would be in the best interest of the buyers agent to initially present a streamlined market analysis to the buyer in order to compile a proper offer and present that offer with the local analysis to the seller's agent. This will serve to: 1) Justify the offer at hand and 2) assist the sellers agent in making sense of the offer, with a minimal amount of insult to them.

It's important to see the deal from both sides of the table. 

• Motivation (for both buyer and seller) can be anything from moving closer to the kids, downsizing, divorce, retiring out of state, etc. This conversation will give you guidance on how aggressive your buyer can or cannot be. Again, there are always some emotional ties on the seller's side. 

• Length of ownership will tell you just how attached the seller is to the property. A long residency means that they raised their family in the house, celebrated holidays, etc. The longer the stay, the more sympathetic and gentle an approach should be considered when working with the seller (and don't forget to have the buyer's agent provide a CMA with the offer).

Be realistic and treat each other as you would want to be treated. Eventually the deal will happen and everyone wins.